you feel time expand and contract,

disintegrate and reconfigure

around and within you.

you have been losing,

letting go,

shedding,

for years.

you wonder if the experience of having

was an illusion.

you have lost loved ones.

some left you crawling on your knees

clawing at the earth

weeping and wailing into the sky.

some, you cut loose

for growth and healing.

others simply floated away, quietly,

seeds scattered on the wind.

you have become so comfortable with loss,

you have forgotten how fullness feels,

how it feels to be held by,

how it feels to be with,

bodies of others.

sitting for hours on end,

in the shade of your overgrown apple tree

you observe the garden that claimed you.

you become silence

surrounded by sound.

you become wordless

in a mind shaped by language.

you are a vessel of breath

dispersing thoughts that want to devour you.

you await inspiration, or instruction,

a moment of wonder…

perhaps the canyon carved into your heart

is an opening into infinity,

readying you

for the greatest love of all.